I don't wanna grow up
this is probably the reason for my absolute lack of maturity and sense
growing up proves to be tough and harsh
but i will learn to be strong one day

Perserverance and Maturity are the two things i seriously lack of..
but i shall not work hard for the Latter

I lied. I lied to you because after that year, I realised that there's no point letting out my secrets. I feel so burdened to let other people no some truth.

I am sorry. It is not that I don't trust you. It's just that there is no need for the truth now. It's okay.
Anyways, I need to exercise some self control.
Control Yourself, Girl!

Sometimes, I yearn for someone that I can recognise as My BestFriend. Mutual acknowledgement that we are important to one another. How jealous I am of those who own these kind of relationship.. the kind of friendship that I can only hope for but never be able to have. Seems pathetic, no? If only I could have one person, just one, to treat me specially.
I no. That's not going to happen.
I no. I'm not worth it.
I no. I'm going to die without feeling special or important to anyone.
Maybe a BestFriend is too much to ask for from me.
Shan't wallow into self pity any longer.
Well... Life's life, I guess.

Wouldn't it be great if I could just shut myself away from this world?
To not hear
To not feel
To not see
To not smell
To not hurt
To not fear
To not tear
To not despair
To not hate...
And To not Love.

Just get me away from you as far as possible before I hurt you... Before I hurt myself.
But the selfish side of me stays stubborn.
Bound to be hurt.

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